The Invisible Load: Why Women Are Doing the Most (And How to Fix It)
- TJuana Albert
- Nov 11
- 3 min read
Ladies!!! If You Feel Like You’re Carrying the Weight of the World, It’s Because…drumroll please…You Probably Are.
Let’s talk about the Invisible Load - all the unseen, unpaid, and unappreciated work women do at home, at work, and everywhere in between.
Because let’s be real:
Remembering everyone’s birthdays? That’s you.
Handling all the “small” admin tasks at work? You again.
Managing the household while also running a career? Still you.
Being the emotional support system for literally everyone? Yep, you guessed it.
👉 In this blog, we’re diving into:
What the Invisible Load is and why it exists
How it’s disproportionately placed on women (especially Black women)
How to redistribute the load, set boundaries, and demand real support
What is the Invisible Load?
The Invisible Load is the work that keeps everything running but isn’t always seen, acknowledged, or valued.
It includes:
✅ Mental load: Keeping track of schedules, to-dos, and planning for the whole family or team.
✅ Emotional labor: Managing people’s feelings, keeping the peace, offering support, absorbing stress.
✅ Household management: The unpaid work of organizing life—meal planning, remembering appointments, running errands.
✅ Office “Housekeeping” Tasks: Taking notes, planning events, remembering birthdays, mentoring junior employees - work that’s expected but not rewarded.
The worst part? This load is unevenly distributed.
Why Women (Especially Black Women) Carry the Heaviest Load
1. Society Still Expects Women to ‘Keep It All Together’
Women are expected to be nurturers, caregivers, and problem solvers—whether we signed up for it or not.
At work, women are more likely to be asked to handle “non-promotable” tasks (like organizing office events or taking notes). (Harvard Business Review)
2. Black Women Carry Even More—And Are Expected to Be ‘Strong’
Black women are often expected to be resilient, supportive, and self-sacrificing.
The “Strong Black Woman” stereotype leads to overwork, burnout, and lack of support.
Studies show that Black women experience higher levels of workplace and caregiving stress compared to their peers. (American Psychological Association)
3. The Pandemic Made It Worse
During COVID, women took on the majority of homeschooling, caregiving, and housework.
Even in two-career households, women did three times more unpaid labor at home than men. (McKinsey & Company)
Many left the workforce entirely due to impossible demands.
How to Stop Carrying the Load Alone
1. Stop ‘Just Doing It’ Because It’s Easier
✅ If you always pick up the slack, no one else will step up.
✅ Start delegating responsibilities at home and work.
✅ Let things go undone until someone else steps up. (Hard, but necessary.)
2. Set Boundaries Without Guilt
✅ Stop saying yes to every request for emotional support or unpaid work.
✅ If it’s not your job, don’t do it. Period.
✅ Enforce consequences—if they ignore your boundaries, they don’t get your time.
3. Demand Real Support (Not Just ‘Let Me Know If You Need Help’)
✅ At home, redistribute the work. Make responsibilities visible and equal.
✅ At work, push back against unfair expectations. Stop volunteering for tasks that won’t advance your career.
✅ Advocate for real workplace policies that support work-life balance (flexibility, mental health days, parental leave).
FAQs: Managing the Invisible Load
Q: How do I get my partner to share the load?
A: Have a direct, honest conversation. Make the invisible visible and write down everything you do and split it fairly.
Q: What if my workplace expects me to do all the ‘extra’ work?
A: Stop volunteering. Say no. Push for equal distribution of “non-promotable” tasks.
Q: How do I set boundaries without feeling guilty?
A: Remember: Your time and energy are valuable. Saying no is an act of self-respect.
Final Thoughts: The Invisible Load is Not Your Burden to Bear Alone
You are not a machine. You don’t have to do it all. It’s time to redistribute the load, demand real support, and stop carrying everyone else’s weight.
💬 Are you feeling the weight of the Invisible Load? Let’s talk about it in the comments!
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